Life through a green spectrum

I need to view life this way. I know nothing is going to get better right now so I'm just going to have to suck it up and deal with it. I know there are certain people that care. And some that would take a d let bullet for me. Actually two that would take a bullet for me. I'm not sure how much either of them will want to after I tell them both something. I honestly think they will both stop talking to me. I'm worried to pieces about that. They both mean so much to me. No matter how opposite ends of the spectrum they may be.

I have been thinking over and over and over again. And I can't decide what I want to do. I've been doing some research on a certain front and times are changing. Keeping up with modern day things. But that leaves me with another decision to make. Stay with the group and prepare for one road of my future or do I break off, prevent anger and arguements, and go for another road of my future. I honestly feel like I'm choosing between someone and something. I don't know and honestly kinda regretting typing this paragraph. Anyways there is just more thinking to be done on my part. Whoopie. I just need to make up my mind and let everyone know. Because I'm sure everyone is tired of the run around as much as i am. ARGH!